The 15 Minute Break

The bullpen water cooler area was abuzz with the ladies from steno
taking their first morning break. "Ohhhhh! There is he is, ladies!
What a gorgeous specimen..." Lisa exclaimed as she and the others
took in the sight of Lee Stetson strolling through the bullpen
doors. "I'd give anything to go on a date with that man."

"Yeah, he is dreamy!! Thinking about those hazel eyes and that sexy
body of his has gotten me through many a boring day down in steno,"
Tobi said with a wistful tone in her voice.

"Well, I can do you one better than that, Tobi! You guys wanna hear
something really delicious?? I've seen the great Scarecrow naked!!"
Tammy whispered conspiratorially.

"No way!!!!" the steno ladies exclaimed in unison.

"What do you mean you saw him naked? IF that's true, then how come
you have never mentioned that to us before, Tammy?" Lisa asked,
doubtful of Tammy's sudden confession.

"Well, a few months back, I took a part-time receptionist job at a
day spa to earn a little extra money. One afternoon, Mr. Stetson
came in for a massage with Lana, who is supposed to be one of the
best massage therapists in D.C. Well, right after he came in, Lana
got an urgent phone call, and I stuck my head in her office door,
thinking she had already started on Mr. Stetson's massage. Much to
my surprise, she hadn't begun yet. Mr. Stetson had just finished
undressing and was getting ready to lie down on the massage table,
and I saw him full-on naked!" Tammy exclaimed, finally stopping to
take a breath.

"What happened?" "What did he say?" "What did you say?" The girls
fired off questions in rapid fire succession.

"Well, of course, after I found my voice and was finally able to look
him in the eyes, I apologized profusely. I told him that Lana had an
urgent phone call and that I was just trying to locate her," Tammy
explained.

"To this day, I don't even think he recognized me as being someone
who works for the Agency. He never even gives me a second glance
when I see him in the hall. Being a spy, you would think he would
remember something like that, wouldn't you?" Tammy asked hopefully.

Suddenly their attention was diverted as the bullpen doors opened,
and Amanda King hurried in and crossed the bullpen. "Oh, there's
Mrs. King," one of the girls announced. The steno girls didn't fail
to notice Scarecrow's reaction to seeing her. "Look at that, it's
like he has radar that alerts him to her presence."

They all observed Scarecrow watching Mrs. King as she made her way
through the bustling bullpen towards him.

"I definitely think Mrs. King is more than just Scarecrow's partner
here at the Agency. I mean, look at the way they look at each other
when they think no one else is watching. I bet they are partners in
his bedroom too. And I heard she was just a housewife before she
came to the Agency…Can you believe that? Definitely NOT his type,"
Tobi confided.

Finally unable to stand hearing the gossip of the steno girls any
longer, Francine popped up from the cubicle adjacent to the water
cooler and said, "Ladies, I think we need to be getting back to work
now down in steno. I believe you have better things to do than
discussing Lee Stetson's love life."

Mortified that their conversation had been overheard by one of the
agency's best female agents, the steno girls quickly scattered
leaving Francine to consider what she had just overheard. She
watched Lee and Amanda from the same vantage point as the steno girls
had been for the past few minutes. The girls might just be on to
something here, she thought as she watched Amanda reach up and smooth
Lee's lapels. The steno girls had piqued Francine's curiosity, and
she vowed to herself that she would not rest until she found out the
truth one way or another as to whether Lee and Amanda were a couple.
This certainly wasn't the first time she had thought along these same
lines. On more than one occasion she had witnessed Lee and Amanda
acting strangely to say the least. And last week when Amanda had
been kidnapped by Birol, she had witnessed Lee's reaction to it
firsthand. It seemed to her, at the time, that his demeanor implied
that he cared about Amanda much more intensely than one would
normally care for their partner.

As Lee and Amanda turned to exit the bullpen, Francine looked on.
She noted that he guided her through the busy office by placing his
hand on the small of her back. She decided that it was definitely
worth looking in to further. Little did she know that, yesterday,
Lee had placed a large diamond engagement ring on Amanda's finger.

End

"So what do we know about the subject?" Billy Melrose looked around at the
small band of agents standing around his desk.

This group he felt was the absolute best that the Agency had to offer. They
could do anything, even if the world would blow apart.

"6ft, 3." Lee Stetson said, blonde hair, hazel eyes.

"Slight limp in the left leg." Alex Winter said. Alex was new to IFF but
they had all felt that he had been there for years.

"Blonde hair, amazing hazel eyes with a ring of black around the edges."
Francine added.

Lee groaned, "thanks for the commentary Francine."

"I call them the way I see them." she quipped back. "It's not his fault
he's wanted in 5 countries."

"Actually it is." Lee began, agitation rising but Billy cut him off.

"People can we get back to business here? Now, what do we know about this
um Seth Anderson. Do I need to remind you that we need to talk to him and
see if he really is the terrorist called "Endgame."

"He usually wears custom made suits." Francine said quickly before Lee could
make fun again. "Italian made."

"He has a mole on his left buttock." Amanda said causally. So casually, no
one noticed what she had just said until Lee's head snapped up and he
growled. "What did you say?"

"I said he has a mole on his left buttock." she dragged the words out this
time, her eyes carefully searching each face as she did.

"Do you mean you saw him naked?" Lee and Francine asked, jealousy etched on
one face, unbelief on the other."

"I think that's a very personal question, Scarecrow." Amanda shot back.

"Then why did you say that?"

"Because it's true and Mr. Melrose did ask for identifying marks."

"But there is absolutely no way you could know that, if you hadn't seen him
au naturel."

"If you say so" she shrugged.

"Why is it Amanda always has it going on with the bad guys." Francine said
jealousy.

"If he is a bad guy." Alex put in."

"Oh, he's got to be." Lee injected. "It all fits." and he gave Amanda a look
that said he wasn't finished with her comment."

"People, people, back to work, please." Billy cut in again. "Now, once
again, what do we know about this guy?"

End

Dotty hustled in the back door. Her arms full of grocery bags. "Amanda, you
are never going to believe what just happened to me?"

"Oh, my gosh, Mother, are you all right?" Amanda rushed over to her mother,
took the bags from her arms and placed them on the counter before giving her
mother the once over. Checking for any signs of injury.

"Oh, darling, I'm fine. But you'll never guess what happened. You know I was
walking home from the store and Mrs. Johnson was standing outside on her
lawn. I stopped to ask her how her husband's surgery went and you'll never
guess, not in a million years. So, I guess, I'll just tell you. She was standing
out there in her birthday suit, for all the world to see. I couldn't believe
it. I just turned my head and came straight home."

"Mother, what do you mean you saw her naked?"

"I mean, she was standing on her lawn without any clothes on. Let me tell
you, that girl should do more exercise and lay off the sweets."

"Gee, I hope she put on some sunscreen. Come on mother, I'll help you put
the groceries away."

End

Shower Surprises

Francine walked along the quiet upstairs hallway leading to the Q-Bureau muttering to herself. She didn’t like being Billy’s errand girl, especially when her inbox was already too full. She also wasn’t in the mood for any of the constant banter that went on between the residents of the Q. But, she was safe. It was seven-thirty in the morning, way too early for either of them to be in yet. Then again, since she had taken the back way up, she hadn’t had a chance to pass by Mrs. Marston to find out if either of them had checked in. No, she rationalized, since neither of them knew about this high priority case yet, chances were very good that neither of them were in yet.

Rounding the corner, Francine was shocked to see the Agency’s resident custodian standing outside the Bureau door. “Rag Mop what are…”

Rag Mop put his finger to his lips and then pointed towards the slightly ajar door.

Francine gave him a curious look. ‘I can’t go in there. It’s not empty.’ She watched the custodian mouth. She moved closer and stopped just outside the door, in order to hear the conversation going on inside. Whatever it was, it had to have been good for both of them to forget to make sure the door was securely closed.

“Amanda, the image will be forever burned into my memory. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to look your mother in the eye again.”

“I still can’t believe you walked in on Mother in the shower.” Francine could hear the laughter in the brunette’s voice.

“I thought it was you in the shower. How was I supposed to know that Phillip had clogged the drain in the other bathroom and that Dotty would be using yours?”

Francine couldn’t take it any longer, she didn’t bother knocking, she just opened the door. “What do you mean you saw her naked?” She sputtered. “Dotty West? Lee, I know you dated a few older women in your time but Dotty West?” She stared open mouthed as she took notice of the position the two were standing in. Lee had his arms wrapped around Amanda’s waist, both of them staring back at her, completely stunned, like a pair of children who’d just been caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

“You both told me that you’d broken up.” Francine put her hand in the air as Lee dropped his arms from around Amanda’s waist and Amanda moved a few inches away and they both opened their mouths, simultaneously, to explain. “You know what I don’t want to hear it. You’re both adults.” She tossed a folder on Amanda’s desk and then turned to leave. “That’s from Billy. A priority one case.” She headed back out the door, turning briefly to nod towards the doorknob. “Next time make sure the door’s closed all the way.”

“And locked too.” Amanda muttered as she made her way over to shut the door. Reaching it, she stopped and stared at the man standing in the hallway.

“Look don’t worry about it, Amanda.” Lee said as he came up behind her, mistaking her hesitation for concern over what Francine was going to say. “At least we don’t have to walk on eggshells around her anymore.”

“No, but I don’t think our secret’s very secret anymore.” Amanda nodded towards the custodian. “Morning, Rag Mop.”

“Morn’n Mrs. K.” Rag Mop nodded and smiled. “Mr. S.”

“Um, Rag Mop. I’m not sure what you heard but…” Lee began, but stopped when the other man put up his hand.

“No need to worry Mr. S. These ears have heard quite a few secrets around the halls of the Agency over the years. They’re all tucked away up here.” Rag Mop tapped his head lightly. “And they have never been or will ever be spoken by these lips.” He put his hand on his mop and began pushing his bucket back down the hallway. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

“Don’t you want to clean in here?” Amanda called after him.

“Nah,” Rag Mop waved back. “I’ll come back later, when the room’s not occupied.” He winked and then made his way around the corner.

Amanda stepped back inside, closed the door firmly and then locked it. She leaned against the frame and bent her head down. “How could we have been so careless Lee?”

Lee moved closer and placing one hand around her waist, he lifted her chin with the finger of his other. “Maybe this was a sign. Maybe it’s someone’s way of telling us to end the secrecy.”

“I don’t think we have to worry about that.” Amanda brought her hand up and began drawing lazy circles on Lee’s chest. “Somehow I doubt that we haven’t heard the last of this from Francine, and someone’s bound to overhear at the wrong time…”

Lee leaned forward and captured her lips. “We’ll make sure we tell the truth to Francine first.” He said after the kiss ended.

“Maybe you’re right. Maybe it is time to come clean.” Amanda smiled as she wrapped her arms around her husband’s neck. “So tell me something. Is my mother that bad looking?”

“Amanda…” Lee stared at his wife. “She’s my mother-in-law.”

"Yes, but what I need to know is, will you still find me attractive
when I reach her age." Amanda began playing with the tendrils of hair
at the nape of his neck.

"Oh, you don't have anything to worry about." Lee's hands
followed the curve of her body as they came to rest behind her
back. "Especially if you take after the West side of the family."
And then, before she had a chance to respond, he captured his wife's
lips once more.

And now... to answer the question what happened when Dotty pulled
back the curtain....

"You thought my mother was good looking?" Amanda asked as
soon as the kiss had ended, a mischievous sparkle in her eyes.

"Well the way I look at it, now your Mother and I are even.
She's seen me, and now I've seen her." Lee smiled, giving her the
full dimpled effect.

"Hold on a second," Amanda leaned back, watching him
suspiciously. "I thought you said the memory was going to haunt you."

"No," Lee shook his head slightly. "What I said was the
memory was going to be burned into my memory forever."

"But the way you said it earlier, made it sound like seeing
my mother naked was a horrible thing." Amanda wiggled, loosening the
grip he had on her waist. "Wait a minute, does that mean you thought
she was attractive?"

Lee was doing his best to choose his words carefully at this
point. "Well I won't lie to you, especially since you were the one
who asked, and I told you truthfully that you have nothing to worry
about, looks wise anyway. But you're right, it was a horrible
thing." He tightened his grip on her waist once more, pulling her
closer. "While the view wasn't that bad, it was the sound she made
that I don't think I'll ever be able to forget. I never knew your
mother's voice could reach that high a pitch. Did I mention she
actually threw the bar of soap at me, all the while scolding me for
having the nerve to just walk in on someone in the shower, her voice
reaching octaves that would make any operatic diva jealous?"

Though Amanda had been doing her best to appear slightly
annoyed, after all he was attacking her Mother, she couldn't keep a
straight face, but did manage to keep from laughing. She had heard
the whole sordid story from her Mother that night when she'd gotten
home from a last minute PTA meeting. Lee had apparently been hoping
to surprise her by joining her in the shower. However, since he'd
been out in the field, he didn't know she wasn't home, and had
surprised her Mother instead. "Well, I guess that means you won't be
pulling anymore shower curtains open without asking who's in there
first."

"You can say that again." Lee smirked. "At least not in your
house. Kind of takes all the fun out of it. Though there's still
the shower at my apartment." His smirk turned into a devilish grin.

Amanda let her hands trail up his back and, as they came to
rest on the back of his neck, she whispered, "Maybe this will help
make the memory of yesterday's incident disappear." And she pulled
his head down, and placed a passionate kiss on his lips.

"It helps," Lee replied huskily against her lips, as the kiss
ended. "It definitely helps."

"Good." Amanda slid her hands down his chest and then pushed
him away. "Now, its time to get to work."

As his wife tried to break the embrace, Lee pulled her
closer. "But it hasn't gotten rid of the memory completely."

Amanda smiled and shook her head. "If you're a good boy all
day, I promise to reward you tonight," she trailed her finger along
his cheekbone, "all night."

"All night?" Lee's face lit up like a kid in a candy store.

Amanda nodded. "I had a feeling that you were going to need a
little tender loving after yesterday so I told Mother we'd be working
in the editing room all night."

Lee abruptly let go of his wife and, practically jumping over
to her desk, picked up the file Francine had deposited a few minutes
earlier. "Well what are we waiting for? Let's get this case finished
and get home."

Amanda shook her head and went over to join her husband. She
hoped for both their sakes, the case was an open and shut one.


The End

The Revelation

"Yes, I did," Lee stated matter of factly as he shook his head.

"What did you say?" Amanda asked.

"You heard me," he said somewhat embarrassed. "Now, can we change
the subject?"

"I don't think so," she said smiling. "Now, what do you mean you
saw him naked?"

Lee blushed and started to get up from the couch. "Amanda!"

She dissolved into a fit of giggles. Between fits of laughter she
managed to say, "You can't say something like that and then not
elaborate. You have to tell me more!"

Her laughter caused him to chuckle as well. "Well, it was not one
of my prouder moments. We had been on a stake out all night and,
well, things began to happen toward dawn. The guy we were looking
for showed up but he spotted us and started running. I took off
after him and tackled him and we rolled into a muddy pit. I was
covered with mud from head to toe."

"But you got `em."

He smiled at her comment. "Anyway, my partner and I returned to the
Agency to deliver the bad guy. Billy took one look at me and told
me to get cleaned up before stepping foot into the debriefing room.
Luckily, I kept a change of clothes at my desk so I headed for the
Agency gym. Once I got inside, I heard this terrible caterwauling.
Man, I thought something was dying."

He had Amanda's attention now so he continued. "I couldn't tell
where it was coming from so I headed into the locker room and the
noise got louder. I figured it was some kind of animal until I got
closer and could make out a noise like singing."

"Singing?"

"Yeah, or something like that. I stripped down, gathered my shaving
kit, and headed to the showers and that's when I saw him."

"What did you do?"

"Well, for a moment I just stood there. I couldn't believe my
eyes. There is all his butt-naked glory was Dr. Smyth, singing at
the top of his lungs."

Once again Amanda rolled on the couch laughing. As she wiped the
tears from her eyes, she managed to ask, "What happened next?"

"I guess I must have dropped my kit because suddenly he turned
around." Lee could only shudder at the memory. "If you think
seeing his pasty, wrinkled old ass wasn't enough, it was nothing
compared to when he turned around. Ewwww!"

Amanda couldn't help but laugh. "What happened next?"

Lee shook his head in disgust at the terrible memory. "I turned and
ran. I went to the nearest restroom and cleaned up as best I could
and finished my debriefing. Billy didn't ask but he could tell I
was rattled. After the debriefing, he asked me what had happened."

"What did you tell him?"

"I couldn't tell him anything. It was too embarrassing. After
studying me a few minutes, Billy finally asked me if I heard any
strange noises coming from the locker room. My head whipped around
and I could only stare at him. From my reaction he knew and
motioned me into his office. `Here,' he said, `is a business card
for the nearest gym. Smyth doesn't have a membership there!'"

The end

A Summer Momment


"What do you mean you saw him naked? Like his butt or something?" The
girl asked again. All the others laughed as soon as she said `butt.'

"No, totally naked." Michael Stetson answered with a shrug. This was
answered with a chorus of `ewwws.'

The five children–3 boys and 2 girls–had wandered onto the Stetson
deck after a long afternoon of playing at the park. It was getting
toward dinner time and as the thought strayed across Michael's mind,
one of the moms called her kid home. Now there was just one girl,
the one who asked him about seeing someone naked.

"How did that happen?"

"Well, he's just my brother and I didn't know he was starting the
shower and I hadda go pee. It happens all the time."

"A lot all the time?" asked the girl.

"Well, no. But, what's the big deal? We're both boys. Same stuff."
Michael asked back.

"Yeah," she thoughtfully agreed.

One of the boys piped up, "So, anyone ever eaten worms?"

"What kind?" Michael asked, "The big fat ones after a rainstorm or
what?"

"Any kind."

Just then, Michael's mom poked her head out the sliding glass door.
"Michael, please don't tell me what you've been doing today, just go
inside, wash your hands and face and change that shirt. Augusta,
Andre, and Charles, go on home for dinner before your mothers call
here looking for you."

"Awwww." "Good night, Ms. Stetson." "Bye, Mike!" "C-ya tomorra!"

Michael couldn't trace what voice went with whom as he moved as slow
as possible to obey his mother. She'd put a sudden stop to all his
summer fun. Even if dinner was the reason, it didn't mean he had to
be happy about it.

The End

Rita and her sister Edna were sitting across the table from Dotty. They had
been invited over for luncheon, and Rita couldn't wait to tell Dotty all she
knew about Amanda's new husband.

She took a sip of her tea, and gently set the cup down in it's saucer. "Oh,
Dotty, you must be so proud of Amanda. I've seen her new husband and I can
say she did a fine job hooking a man like that. She is one lucky lady."

Dotty beamed at her guests. "Oh, my, yes, Lee is a wonderful man and we are
all lucky to have him. It's wonderful to have a man around the house to do
all those little things like reaching the high shelves. He's great with the
boys, too. Taking them out, doing 'guy' things. Why just the other day, he took
Phillip for his learners permit, and gave him his first driving lesson. And
best of all, he treats Amanda like a princess. You can see how much he loves
her just by looking at him looking at her. Of course, Amanda feels the same
way. I can honestly say, I've never seen her happier."

"Oh, trust me, Dotty," Rita gloated, "it's more then feelings making your
daughter happy. That man is hung like a horse. I'm amazed Amanda can walk. If I
had that in my bed, you can bet I wouldn't let him out again for a very,
very long time." Rita nudged her sister and winked at Dotty.

Dotty's face turned red. "Well, I'm sure he's . . . I mean . . . I guess he
makes my daughter happy in that department. I've never really given it much
thought."

"No, Dotty, you don't understand," Edna finally spoke. "Rita, knows what
she's talking about. She saw him with her own eyes. Right there on your front
lawn."

Dotty looked back and forth between Edna and her sister. They could see the
wheels turning in Dotty's mind as she thought about what they were telling
her, and the exact moment when she reached the only conclusion she could.

“What do you mean, you saw him naked?” Dotty exclaimed.

Rita grinned and nodded her head.

"How did you see him naked?"

"Well, you see," Edna began.

"It's my story and I'd appreciate it if you'd let me tell it." Rita
admonished her sister. She turned to Dotty and began, "Well, one morning last week, I
was bird watching from the window in Edna's living room and I saw your
son-in-law, tip-toeing down the lawn for the morning paper wearing nothing but a
skimpy towel.

Evidently, he must have locked himself out of the house and I watched his
vain attempts to get back inside.The poor boy wasn't having any luck. Then that
pesky St. Bernard from next door wandered into your yard and decided to play
tug-of-war with Lee. The dog won and raced off with his towel."

"And that's when you saw him naked?" Dotty queried.

"Oh, no dear. I didn't get an eyeful until the poor dear fell off the
trellis. I hope he didn't hurt anything vital." She winked, and smiled to herself.
That was enough of the story for Dotty. There was no way she was going to
share everything she saw that day.

End.

Satin and Scones


Dotty opened the front door and stepped into the foyer.
Finally, after what had seemed like an eternity, she was home.
Shutting the door behind her, she called for her daughter. Not
getting a reply, she headed into the kitchen and threw her purse on
the counter. "Amanda," she called again, but still all she received
in response was silence. She glanced around the counter and on the
fridge, looking for any indication of a note. Not that she expected
to get one; after all she wasn't even expected home for another few
hours.

However, after what Dotty had just heard at the beauty parlor
from Millicent, she had decided to skip the mall and head straight
home. She had to share the news with Amanda. Since there wasn't any
note, and Amanda's car was in the driveway, she decided to try
upstairs.

As Dotty reached the top of the stairs, she heard the sound
of running water coming from Amanda's room. She was about to turn
and head back downstairs when she heard the water shut off. This
news was too good to sit on…she was just bursting to tell Amanda. It
wasn't that she didn't want to respect Amanda's privacy, but what did
her daughter have that she hadn't seen a dozen times? She opened the
bedroom door and headed into her daughter's room. "Amanda, you just
have to hear what Millicent McDonald told me…" Her voice trailed off,
and she stared at the handsome man in front of her. "Oh my." Her
eyes grew wide as they took in the dripping wet hunk of manhood that
stood before her.

Dotty was mesmerized by the sight. She had always said that
Lee was an eleven but that was just on his looks and manners, now, as
she scanned his tightly muscled abs and legs and stared admiringly at
his package, she decided she was wrong. Very wrong. He was
definitely a fifteen.

Lee was just as stunned as Dotty was. He had been drying
himself off when he'd heard the bedroom door open. Thinking that his
fiancée had entered, he hadn't bothered to wrap the towel around
himself before making his way into the bedroom. However, now, as he
quickly realized that he was still standing there stark naked, he
automatically began to wrap it around his waist. Unfortunately, in
his embarrassed state, he couldn't get the towel knotted, and it
slipped from his fingers. As he bent down to pick it up, he banged
his head on the doorframe. "Ouch!"

"Lee… Oh, are you okay." Dotty shook her head and
automatically started towards the now injured man. Then, realizing
that he was still naked and that she had been staring at him, she
quickly turned her now beat red face away from the picture of
perfection, spun around and almost ran out of the bedroom.

Clutching his now throbbing head with one hand, Lee stood up
and tried to tie the towel around his waist. "Dotty!" He called after
her. He started to head out of the room after her, but decided that
it probably wasn't the best idea to go after her wearing nothing but
a towel. He dropped the towel and grabbed the pair of shorts he'd
left on Amanda's bed. He tried to put them on as he walked and
managed to trip himself. With one hand still on his shorts, he put
the other one out in front to meet the floor. He didn't need another
smack on the head. This day was already turning into a nightmare.

Standing back up, Lee pulled his shorts all the way on and
made his way towards the door. He stopped just as he reached it and
realized he couldn't go after his future mother-in-law in just a pair
of shorts. Amanda yes, but not Dotty. Not wanting to waste anymore
time, he grabbed the first thing he could lay his hands on and
slipping his arms into the sleeves, he raced out the door and down
the stairs.

"Dotty!" Lee called as he ran down the steps two at a time.
He prayed she hadn't run outside. If she had left the house, he'd be
faced with a dilemma. Did he run after his future mother-in-law, or
stay inside? If he ran after her, then he would stir up more trouble
for Amanda. It would be very hard for his fiancée to avoid the gossip
that his current attire was going to spread through the neighborhood
rumor mill. But if he didn't run after her, then things between
himself and Amanda's mother would be extremely awkward, and that
wasn't how he wanted to start out married life… having to walk on
eggshells around his own mother-in-law. "Dotty!" He called again as
he jumped down the last step and turned into the kitchen-den area.
He let out a brief sigh of relief when he saw that she was still
inside. "I have a very good explanation..."

Dotty had been walking aimlessly around the den. Her mind
was a mixture of embarrassment, shock and anger. She didn't know Lee
all that well, and while she had suspected that Lee and Amanda were
now dating somewhat seriously, she hadn't realized it was that
serious. Lee was practically a stranger to her and she had just
found him, naked, in her daughter's bathroom. Upon hearing Lee
descending the stairs, she'd gone over to the coffee table and picked
up the pile of magazines and began re-organizing them. Unable to
look at her daughter's boyfriend, she kept her eyes focused on the
pile of magazines in her hand. "Okay, explain. I can't wait to hear
what you were doing in Amanda's shower…" She placed the now organized
magazines on to the table and then still not wanting to look at Lee,
picked them back up again. "And while we're on the subject, where
exactly is my daughter?"

"Amanda had to run and pick up something…" Lee began with
the safe answer.

"Protection?" Dotty muttered under her breath, a little
louder she pressed the issue again. "And you were using her shower
why?"

"It was closer than going back to my apartment." He began a
bit lamely. He didn't know where to go from there. He couldn't
exactly tell her why he'd been was using Amanda's shower. He'd just
spent the better part of his morning going through a dumpster looking
for a microdot and that the smell had been overpowering and that
Amanda's house was much closer. So he decided to try a diversionary
tactic. "I'm sorry. I thought you were Amanda." He replied and then
realized how lame even that answer sounded. He never was good at
explaining anything to a parental figure, he seemed to get all tongue
tied.

"Well that much was obvious." Dotty picked up the pile and
re-arranged the magazines a second time. "Even if you thought I was
Amanda, don't you know that walking around naked and wet is never a
good idea?" Despite her current emotions, she was a mother, and her
motherly instincts took over. "You could catch cold." She had a
strong desire to give him the motherly glare he deserved, but she was
still too embarrassed to look him in the face.

Amanda chose that moment to enter through the back door.
Before she had a chance to take in the situation fully, she replied
automatically to her mother's comment. "What do you mean you saw him
naked?" Then, taking one quick look at her husband in her pink satin
bathrobe, drops of water still clinging to his freshly washed and not
yet combed hair and her mother avoiding all eye contact, she bit her
lip to keep from laughing.

Dotty felt relieved to finally have someone to make eye
contact with, and removing her gaze from the magazines in her arms,
she glanced up and glared at her daughter. "I was looking for you."
She dropped the magazines unceremoniously onto the table. "Why isn't
important." Placing her hands on her hips, and gave the motherly
glare to her daughter. "What I really want to know, and have yet to
get a straight answer on, is what he," she pointed back towards
Lee, "was doing in your room, naked and looking for you, in the first
place."

Amanda's gaze moved to her fiancé and while he looked damn
sexy, even if he was in her bathrobe, the sight of him in her
bathrobe was making it very hard for her to keep a straight face.
Knowing that her mother was probably extremely embarrassed, as was
Lee, laughing now was not going to make the situation
better. "Lee," she moved her gaze to his face as she walked over to
him. "Why don't you go put these clean clothes on," she handed him
the small duffle bag she'd brought back from his apartment. "I'll
explain to mother."

Lee started to open his mouth to remind her not to give away
trade secrets, then stopped. Amanda had come up with enough stories
over the last three and a half years, that he really had no reason to
worry. "Okay." He reached out to take the bag from her, but almost
lost his balance, again, when she pulled him closer.

"I like the outfit." Amanda whispered and then placed a kiss
on his cheek. "Now, go." She smiled as she watched him turn around,
and resisted the urge to give his satiny bottom a smack; she didn't
need to give her mother anymore ammo than she already had. She
waited until he had gone up a few steps before turning back to face
the infamous West inquisition.

Dotty had watched the exchange between her daughter and Lee
with extreme interest. Obviously there was a lot more going on than
a couple in the early stages of dating. Amanda and Lee were a lot
more comfortable with each other. She really shouldn't be surprised,
after all her daughter was an adult, and was entitled to a fulfilling
love-life. After all, she still enjoyed a good romp in the hay.
Now, she met her daughter's questioning and expectant gaze with a
shrug and moved over to sit on the couch and patted the cushion
beside her.

Amanda took the cue and moved into the den, sitting down and
turning to face her mother. "It was all perfectly innocent Mother,"
she began, "we were checking out this restaurant for a possible
documentary on places on Capitol Hill frequented by diplomats and
Lee's camera lens fell into one of the dumpsters. He ended up going
into the dumpster to retrieve it. And rather than smell like garbage
all day, and since I lived closer than his apartment, we just came
here. Trust me, the stench was awful. It was so bad, I ended up
throwing his other clothes away. So while he showered, I ran back to
his place to grab some clothes for him." She watched her mother's
face wondering if Dotty believed her. Her mother really had no
reason not to; after all it was almost the whole truth. Lee had gone
into the dumpster, just not to retrieve a camera lens.

Dotty sighed and patted her daughter's leg
affectionately. "Amanda, dear. You're a grown woman, I have no
right to judge what you do with your life. I guess I was just a
little more embarrassed than anything and I took my embarrassment out
on Lee a little more angrily than I had planned."

"What were you doing in my room anyway, Mother?" Amanda
asked, her expression curious. "I mean, you don't normally just come
barging in without knocking and waiting for a response, first. And
come to think of it, aren't you supposed to be at the mall with Edna
right now?"

Suddenly the reason for coming home early came rushing back
to Dotty, and her early embarrassment immediately dissipated. "Yes,
but I found something out that I just had to share with you before it
got around the neighborhood. You know what, why don't I go fix us
both a cup of tea, and tell you over one of those nice scones you
picked up this morning?" She pushed off from the cushion and rose
from her seat.

Amanda's curiosity was now really piqued. Whatever it was,
it had to be really good to make her mother miss an afternoon of
shopping. "That sounds like a good idea." She stood up and followed
her mother into the kitchen. "I'll get the scones and plates down."

Dotty took the kettle from the stove, and as she placed it
under the faucet, Amanda went to the cabinet beside her to take down
some plates. "By the way, dear, I take back what I said about Lee."

With three plates in hand, Amanda looked over at her
mother. "Oh?"

"Yes, I was wrong. He's not an eleven. He's not even a
fifteen. I may never be able to look him in the eyes again, but I
can tell you with absolutely certainty," Dotty turned off the water
and walking around her daughter, placed the kettle on the
stove, "he's a twenty."

"That he is, Mother." Amanda leaned back and caught sight of
her now fully dressed fiancé standing on the landing. "That he is."
She winked and then made her way over to the kitchen table with the
bag of scones and plates in hand. This afternoon was going to be
very interesting indeed, but one thing was certain, she wasn't going
to let her mother or fiancé leave the house until they could both
look each other in the eye again.


The End

A Coming out of Sorts

Jenna and her best buddy, Robin from next door, were playing in the
backyard under the watchful eye of Jenna's mother, who was preparing
dinner. The window over the kitchen sink was open and she could hear
the girls talking and occasionally giggling as only little girls can
do. Amanda wasn't really listening to what they were saying. She
just knew as long as she could her them they were close to the house
and safe. In addition, Hershey, their chocolate lab was in the
backyard with the girls and he would alert Amanda to any danger that
might be present.

"Hi, Daddy," an excited Jenna exclaimed when Lee pulled into the
drive.

"Hi, yourself, Punkin," he said as he picked up the little girl and
tossed her into the air.

Jenna squealed and Lee laughed. "And hello to you too, Miss Robin."

Robin coyly batted her eyes and softly said, "Hi, Mr. Stetson."

"What are you girls up to today?" he asked giving Hershey a pat on
the head.

"Just playin'… That's all. Want to join us?" Jenna asked.

"Maybe in a little bit. Let me check on Mommy and take a shower
first. Then if there's time before dinner, I would be happy to play
with two such lovely ladies as you."

The girls giggled and went back to their tea party and Lee headed
into the house.

"Hey, good lookin'! What's shakin'?" He walked over to Amanda,
wrapped his arms around her and kissed her soundly.

"Hey, yourself, handsome. How come you're so late? I thought the
meeting was supposed to be over at two." She glanced at the clock
and it was 4:15.

"Well," he began as he snatched a carrot from the salad she was
preparing, "Callahan went off on a tangent and nobody could shut him
up. You know how those budget meetings can be."

"Yeah, I'm just thankful I didn't have to be there," she replied as
she swatted his hand.

He laughed and said, "I'm going upstairs to take a shower. Sitting
in that room all afternoon with Smyth smoking that damned cigarette,
has me smelling like a smokestack. See you in a bit," he hollered as
he headed up the steps.

Unbeknownst to Amanda and Lee, four little ears heard the exchange.
After a few moments, the girls came into the house and Jenna
announced that they were going up to her room to play.

"Okay, Sweetheart, dinner should be ready in a little bit. Robin, if
you would like to stay for dinner I can call your mother to see if
it's okay."

"That's okay, Mrs. Stetson. My Mom is cookin' my favorite tonight,
beanies and weenies. I don't want to miss that," Robin replied
giggling with Jenna at the mention of weenies.

"All right girls, you go on and play. I'll call you when dinner's
ready." Amanda went about the kitchen preparing dinner while the
girls headed upstairs. They were almost at the top of the stairs
when Jenna took Robin's arm and pulled her to a stop.

"We have to be REAL quiet now or my Daddy will hear us. Tiptoe, like
me," Jenna said and proceeded to tiptoe up the last two stairs and
down the hall to her parents' room. "Shh," she whispered as she
tugged on Robin's arm to pull her down in front of the bathroom
door. "My Daddy's takin' a shower so maybe we'll get lucky." The
girls sat patiently for a few minutes when they heard the water shut
off.

Sure enough, moments later, the bathroom door opened and a very naked
Lee stepped into the bedroom nearly falling over the girls who were
seated right outside the door. "What the ….." he exclaimed as he
jumped back into the bathroom and slammed the door. "Jenna!"

The sternness in his voice caused both girls to jump up and race
downstairs. They clamored down the stairs and into the kitchen,
racing toward the door.

"What's gotten into you two?" Amanda asked as the girls streaked
by. "You're acting like your tail's on fire."

Both girls giggled and Jenna said, "Robin's gotta go. Me and Hershey
are gonna walk her home, okay?" Before Amanda could answer they were
both out the door and calling for Hershey. Since Robin lived right
next door, it was common for Jenna and Hershey to walk Robin home
through the backyard. And since Amanda could see them through the
window, she allowed it.

"Jenna! Jenna, you come hear right now, I want to talk with you," Lee
bellered as he came down the steps. "JENNA!"

"Lee, calm down, what's going on? Why are you so upset?" Before Lee
could answer the phone rang and he snatched up the
receiver. "Stetson," he said curtly. "Yeah, hang on a minute, he
said. "Amanda, I've gotta take this call in the office. Will you
hang it up once I pick up the extension?" he asked but he was already
heading toward their office.

"Wait, Lee, what happened with Jenna? What's going on?"

"Amanda, its Billy. I have to take this. I'll be back in a few
minutes."

Amanda decided it was time to get to the bottom of this. She headed
outside and called to Jenna. But there was no answer. She called a
second time and still no answer but Hershey was sitting under the
tree that held the tree house. It seemed whenever Jenna knew she was
in trouble, she would head for the tree house to hide. "Jenna, I
know you're up there. And I want you to come down, now!"

"No, Mommy, I can't."

"What do you mean you can't?"

"Daddy's mad at me and I'm not coming down," she said tearfully.

Amanda realized that this was going to call for some Class C
interrogation on her part so she climbed up the ladder to the tree
house. Once inside she sat down on one of the princess chairs and
quietly asked once more, "Jenna, why do you think Daddy is mad at
you? Did you do something to make him mad?"

Jenna's bottom lip began to quiver and tears rolled down her face.
Amanda gathered the little girl into her arms and slowly rocked her
hoping to assuage her fears. "Sweetheart, you know Daddy could never
be mad at you. He loves you very much. Remember, he told you the
other night that he loves you this much," she demonstrated holding
her arms out at her sides. "And just last week, didn't you and Daddy
go horseback riding?" At the mention of the pony farm, Jenna's face
brightened.

"Yeah, that was fun. I got to ride the spotted pony and Daddy said I
was the bestest one there," she stated proudly.

"See that's right, Daddy could never be made at you. You're his
little princess."

"Mommy," she stated emphatically, "I'm not his princess, I'm his
punkin."

"Of course, my mistake. Now can you tell me why you think Daddy's
mad at you?"

Jenna shook her head and looked down into her lap, but Amanda gently
lifted her chin and gave the girl an encouraging nod.

Jenna hemmed and hawed a bit, her tiny hands twisting in her lap.
Temporarily forgetting that she was upset, her eyes began to sparkle
and she whispered, "Can you keep a secret, Mommy?"

Amanda chuckled, "Yes, sweetie, I think I can."

Jenna leaned forward, wrapped her arms around Amanda's neck and
whispered in her ear.

"What do you mean you saw him naked? And Robin, too!" The words `Oh
My Gosh' were on the tip of her tongue but she held them back.

Jenna exclaimed, "Mommy, sshhhh! Somebody will hear you."

"I'm sorry, Sweetheart. Listen, why don't we go back inside? We'll
sit down together with Daddy and see if we can straighten this out."
As they climbed down the steps, Amanda was thinking how she was going
to explain to Robin's mother what had happened.

They reached the kitchen the same time as Lee. "Jenna!" he exclaimed
and at the same time Amanda shouted, "Lee!"

"Why don't we all sit down and talk this out," Amanda said. She
helped Jenna into one of the stools at the counter. "Lee," she said
as she inclined her head toward another one of the stools.

"Okay," Lee said drawing a deep calming breath, "do you want to tell
me why you and Robin were sitting outside our bathroom door while I
was taking a shower?"

Jenna squirmed in her seat. "Hmm, well…it was …cause we just wanted
to …we wanted to see your hoo hoo."

"My what?"

"Your hoo hoo, Daddy. Daddys have them and boys have them and well,
Alex Braxton in our class was going on and on the other day about how
boys were better than girls because they have hoo hoo's and girls
don't and that girls were dumb because they'd lost their hoo hoo's
somewhere along the way. So we wanted to see one so we could tell
Alex he didn't know everything like he thinks he does."

`It must be in the genes', Lee thought, `she rambles just like her
mother.'

Amanda was doing everything in her power to keep from laughing. Just
the thought of four year olds discussing hoo hoo's was enough to send
her reeling.

Lee looked to Amanda and quickly looked away in order to keep from
laughing himself. "Look, Jenna, I'm gonna tell you everything you
need to know about," he stuttered for a moment, "hoo hoo's. They're
poison and you should stay away from them."

Amanda's eyes widened at Lee's comment and she was about to say
something when Jenna piped up.

"They are not poison, Daddy!"

He was almost afraid to ask but ask he did, "And how do you know
that?"

Jenna proudly sat up straighter and replied, "Because if they were,
the dog would be dead!"

Both Amanda and Lee burst into fits of laughter. Soon Jenna joined
in and they all giggled.

Amanda was the first to recover. She said, "How about we have
dinner. Young lady, you head upstairs and wash up. Then, you and I
and your Daddy will have a little talk.

The end.

“Hey Christine, you’ll never guess.”

“Morning Sylvie. You had breakfast yet?” Christine helped herself to a plate of something that resembled scrambled eggs.

“Ugh, no I couldn’t,” she shuddered. “Not after what I just saw!”

“You’re on duty in the diplomatic sector aren’t you?” Christine started shoveling the food into her mouth with undisguised disgust. “What could you have seen there apart from a load of stuffed shirts?”

“I had to clean Ambassador G’Kar’s quarters. I thought they were empty.” Sylvie lowered her voice to a whisper. “They weren’t. He was still in bed. And he wasn’t alone! He heard me enter and came out to investigate the noise. He didn’t even stop to put on a robe. I didn’t know what to look at.”

Christine’s eyes were as wide as dinner plates as she mouthed the question she was dying to ask. “What, do you mean you saw him naked?”

Sylvie face looked green as she nodded in the affirmative.

A thousand more questions flew through Christine’s mind at the speed of sound. But by the look on Sylvie’s face, she didn’t think it would be wise to ask for a description of exactly what she’d seen that morning.