Part Nineteen: Panic/Ruined

Wednesday, February 14, 2001

4247 Maplewood Dr

5:10 PM

"Mmm...that smells good." Lee bent down to nuzzle his wife's neck from behind.

"Is it me or the chili?" Amanda turned to face him.

"Both." Lee smiled as he pulled her body close to his. "I love you and I love
your chili."

"Well you better, buster." Amanda teased as their lips met in a long and
satisfying kiss.

"Oh, and I stopped to pick up a little something." Reaching into his jacket
pocket, Lee pulled out a heart-shaped box of chocolates. "Happy Valentine's Day.
I know we did presents last night, but still--"

Amanda smiled. "Lee, this is wonderful--I got you something too--it's upstairs."

"Upstairs?" Lee said. "Something to look forward to later?"

"I would say it's worth looking forward to, yeah."

"Well that sounds wonderful, Mrs. Stetson."

"It should be." Amanda ran her hand down his arm. "And mother's out with
Captain Curt--I'm not sure how late she'll be, but she said not to wait up for
her."

"So, everyone gets a little romance tonight--that's good."

"It should be--though last night was pretty romantic too," Amanda said.
"Lee--what else have you got in your pocket?"

"I almost forgot." Lee pulled out the small pink and red stuffed turtle. "I got
this for Jenna--thought it looked cute."

"It's adorable." Amanda held the turtle, looking at the nametag. "Squirtle the
Turtle--Jenna will love it."

"Where is she?"

"In the family room, watching the news," Amanda said. "She wanted the lights off
though--she said her head hurt a little."

"Since when is Jenna interested in the news?"

"Her social studies assignment is to watch the local news for two weeks and
write a paper," Amanda explained. "It's not unusual--I seem to remember either
Phillip or Jamie having to do something similar when they were in school."

"How was she when you picked her up--did she seem like she had a good day?"

"Well I think so." Amanda turned back towards the chili to stir it as she
spoke, lowering her voice. "I get the feeling that something is worrying her but
she wasn't exactly forthcoming. Did she tell you anything at all this morning?"

Lee tried to think back. "Only that she was having trouble concentrating on her
schoolwork--that everything was harder than it used to be. I told her to give it
time."

"And Dr. Pfaff said that trouble concentrating is part of PTSD?"

Lee nodded. "He said it's hard to concentrate when your mind's constantly
telling you that you're in danger."

"That does make sense."

"I guess--it just seems--"

"Like something else happened to her?"

"Amanda, I just want to know," Lee said. "I need to know--exactly what he did to
her. The fact that she can't remember what happened during the head injury--it
bothers me--she's still so frightened--I don't know if we can make that fear go
away if she's holding back on us."

'Look who's rambling now, Stetson,' he thought to himself.

Amanda nodded. "Dr. Pfaff is right--hypnotherapy could help."

Yeah." Lee cast a brief glance out into the family room--checking that Jenna
was still watching TV before turning back to his wife. "The problem is getting
Jenna to go along with it--it could be a scary thing for her."

"I think if we talk and explain everything she'll be all right," Amanda said.
"But you know that even if we find out that Jenna was--if she was assaulted in
that way, it isn't your fault. Right?"

Lee hesitated--at that point the phone rang--saving him from having to answer.
Breathing a silent sigh of relief he picked up the cordless. "Stetson
residence."

"Lee, it's Francine--I just wanted to give you a heads up on the Johnston case."

Lee's hand tightened around the receiver. "What kind of heads up? What's going
on?"

"Johnston's hired a new legal team and get this--the head of that team is Dennis
Baylor."

"Baylor?" Lee repeated. "As in Dennis "The Hammer" Baylor? That jerk who never
misses a photo op?"

"The man's a media whore." Even over the phone Francine's voice dripped with
contempt. "I just got off the phone with the Commonwealth's
Attorney--defense-wise Johnston doesn't have a leg to stand on but that's not
going to stop this creep from talking to everyone he can and--oh no."

"What is it, Francine?"

"Yours truly is on local news right now--he's holding a press conference."

Local news--and Jenna was watching--"Oh God--" Lee's mind raced--he ran a hand
back through his hair. "Francine, listen--there's a little emergency--I'll call
you right back." Without waiting for a reply he hung up the phone and ran into
the family room with Amanda following.

Baylor's smug features filled half the screen--the other half showed a photo of
Johnston at his arraignment hearing. The former councilman was in handcuffs and
ankle cuffs, wearing an orange jumpsuit but his eyes--that smirk across his
face--

What Lee wouldn't have given at that moment to be able to put his hands through
the screen, wrap his fingers around Johnston's throat and just squeeze--

"It's very easy to judge, but there are two sides to this story," Baylor was
saying. "My client is innocent until proven guilty, and once all the facts come
to light, I'm sure that Gary Johnston will be exonerated and released. Good
day." Cursing silently, Lee grabbed the remote and turned off the set.

Then he turned to look at his daughter.

Even in the dim light he could see the fear in her wide eyes--she clutched a
pillow tightly in her arms, rocking back and forth.

"Munchkin?" Lee knelt beside her. "He's never getting out--I promise you
that--Gary can't hurt you anymore--you're safe." Her hands--Christ, they felt
icy--he could feel them trembling as he took them inside his own. Amanda turned
on a nearby lamp, illuminating the room--Jenna's eyes looked huge in her pale
face--the pupils so dilated they were nearly black.

"I'm not--" Jenna said. "That other man--he just said--"

"Oh, sweetheart," Amanda sat beside Jenna, putting an arm around her, holding
her close. "It'll be all right--Lee, the afghan, she's shivering--" Lee could
see the anxiety in his wife's eyes. Together they wrapped the blanket around
her.

Lee took Jenna's hands again--still so cold--he began rubbing them vigorously,
trying to bring some warmth back into her skin.

"Listen to me," Lee said. "I don't care what that--excuse for an attorney says.
Gary Johnston is not getting out--there's way too much evidence against him."

"Your father's right," Amanda told her. "That man's in jail and that's where
he's going to stay for a very long time."

If Jenna heard any of their reassurances, though--she gave no sign.

"He'll find me--find me and I--I can't go through that again--" her voice was
nearly a whisper."I can't--I just can't do it."

"Can't do what?" Lee asked. "What can't you go though again? Munchkin,
please--please answer me."

Jenna looked down at her arm.

"I lost it--" she said. "Dad, where did it go?"

Lee shook his head, flummoxed by the sudden change of subject. "where did what
go?"

"My watch." Jenna's voice rose. "Where did it go?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Lee said. "What watch?"

"The Disney watch--the one you bought for me--"

"Jenna, I--honestly, I don't know," Lee said. "Why are you so worried about your
watch all of the sudden?"

"You probably misplaced it," Amanda suggested gently. "Don't worry--we'll find
it again."

"No! You don't understand," Jenna said. "I'm sure I had it on--I know I did--I
had it on before he--"

"Before he what?" Amanda asked. "Sweetheart, what did he do? You can tell us."

"No," Jenna said vehemently. "I don't--I don't --know--I can't--" her breathing
was quick and shallow--her chest rose and fell rapidly...

"Jenna?" But she wasn't listening, Lee realized. Her eyes were glassy--skin so
pale--she began to wheeze slightly with each breath.

"Can't--Dad--" she managed to gasp out. Her hands pulled out of his and
clutched blindly at the arm of the sofa--Lee could see the panic in her
expression.

Hyperventilating, he thought. "Amanda, get Kelford on the phone--" he said.
"Pfaff too, if you can--I want them on standby." Amanda nodded and stood, going
into the kitchen.

Lee knew he had to act fast--he sat beside Jenna on the sofa. "Look at me," he
told her--fighting to keep his voice calm. "Look at my face, Jenna, right into
my eyes--" He wasn't sure how many times he repeated this but finally Jenna's
gaze turned to meet his.

"Yeah, that's it--now breathe," Lee said. "Slowly, in and out--you're doing
fine--slowly--don't stop breathing."

It felt like forever--as gradually Jenna's breathing returned to normal. Lee
watched in relief as color started to creep back into his daughter's cheeks.

"How do you feel?" he asked her.

"Better, I guess--my chest hurts but it's not bad--" Jenna's eyes filled with
sudden tears. "I'm sorry--for acting that way--I don't know why--it was just
seeing--"

Lee wrapped his arms around Jenna, pulling her close. "Shhh..." he soothed. "I
know--don't worry about it."

"I wish I could forget it, you know? Forget his face--" Jenna said. "But I
can't--and every time I close my eyes he's there, waiting for me--waiting to--"
Lee felt Jenna's body shudder slightly "--and I just get so scared--his eyes--"

"Well, if it helps you feel better--remember that when you saw Gary Johnston
just now his hands and ankles were cuffed. He's in a cell, Jenna--he's the
prisoner now--not you--and he'll never have the chance to hurt you or anyone
else, ever again."

"I'll try--"

"Want to talk about it? About what--about what he did?"

"Not right now, Dad--it's just--it's just hard."

"What about your watch?"

Jenna was silent for a few moments--Lee held his breath--hoping that he hadn't
triggered another episode by pushing for too much too soon.

Jenna sighed. "Oh, I don't know--not even sure about why I thought about it, but
when I saw him--Gary--somehow that brought it back--I could've sworn that I had
the watch--but now--you know, everything's so screwed around in my head that I'm
not sure of much--maybe I just thought I had it on that day." Another sigh.
"This is frustrating."

"Well memories can be that way. Just don't rush it--there's no hurry."

"But--I'm not being very helpful, am I? I'm sorry."

"You're just fine," Lee told her. "And just remember--whenever you feel like
talking your mom and I will be here."

SMK SMK SMK SMK 

 8:30 PM

"At least Jenna managed to eat some of her dinner." Closing the bedroom door,
Amanda sat down on the edge of the bed. "Poor thing--that really took a lot out
of her."



"Yeah, it did," Lee said. "You know, she was so tired that she might sleep
straight through for the second night in a row--" he laughed shortly "--I guess
we should be grateful for something out of all this mess, huh?"



"Dr. Pfaff says he'd like to see Jenna tomorrow--an early morning session--she
might miss homeroom and her first period, but I can work it out with the school
in the morning."



"Sure--why not--the way things are going she's probably going to have to end up
repeating the grade anyway."



"Lee--"



"Amanda, I'm sorry--I really didn't mean it like that--it's just--I thought
Jenna was doing pretty well and then this happens and it feels like we're right
back at square one--"



"Yeah, I know what you mean."



"She's not going to do any more of these assignments at school--I'm not having
her watching the news--we can't risk this happening again." Lee sat down beside
Amanda on the bed.



"I agree," Amanda said. "We'll talk to the school tomorrow--see if they can
arrange an alternate assignment."



"We'll also need to talk to the Commonwealth's Attorney," Lee said. "See how we
can play this--I never expected things to happen this quickly--I thought we'd
have more time."



"Time moves fast." Amanda gave a small sigh.



"That it does. It's funny, you know? All I wanted was a nice evening, for us to
have a good evening, for Jenna--" Lee took the stuffed turtle out of his pocket,
looking down at it. "I didn't even get a chance to give her this--her
Valentine's Day present--it was all ruined. I swear, I'd like to take that
slimeball of a defense attorney by his throat and--"



"Believe me, I know exactly how you feel?"



"That man could just plead guilty, Amanda." Lee's voice rose. "He knows what
he's done--the weight of the evidence against him. He could spare us all a hell
of a lot of pain and trouble, but he won't--and do you know why? Because he
enjoys this--he enjoys the idea that he's hurting Jenna--causing her fear and
pain--I swear the bastard gets off on terrorizing her--at this point I wouldn't
put anything past him."



"You still think he--"



"Yes, I still think that--what else am I supposed to think? Look at the
physical reaction she had just from seeing a photo of the guy on TV--there's
something else there--I'm just not sure what yet."



"Where does the watch fit in?"



"Well there's the million-dollar question." Lee ran his hands through his hair.
"I just wish I knew the answer--Jenna knows, but she's either too frightened to
say or she's repressing it somehow. I don't know. But the thought of my daughter
being at the mercy of someone like that is--" He couldn't bring himself to
finish the statement.



Amanda fell silent for a moment, biting her lower lip. "That's not the only
thing missing," she said. "You remember that black belt I had, the one with the
silver buckle and the little rhinestones on it? I lent it to Jenna that
morning--she wanted to wear it with her jeans."



"I remember now--it was in the missing person's report." Lee said. "Amanda, how
do a missing watch and a belt go together?"



"I'm not sure yet, but I think it all fits in with her missing memories
somehow--and I don't think it deals with the kind of assault you're thinking
of."



"How can you be so sure?"



"I'm not completely sure," Amanda said. "But my instincts are telling me that's
not what happened--it's just a feeling."



"Your feelings are usually right on target, though." Lee took her hand. "And in
this case I certainly hope they are."



"Me too."



"What gets me so frustrated is that I feel helpless--when she was little and she
scraped her knee I could always make it better--now I can't fix everything--I
can't make it all better."



"But you do." Amanda squeezed his hand. "You have. Lee, this could've been a lot
worse. Dr. Pfaff said that if you hadn't helped Jenna control her breathing she
would've gone into shock and probably ended up in the hospital. I'm just glad
you were there--to help her through it."



"Yeah, I'm glad I was there too." Lee said. "By the way--what was the
Valentine's Day present you said you had for me?"



A red, sexy nightgown--" Amanda covered a yawn with her hand. "Only now I think
I might be too tired. "



"That's okay--" Lee pulled his wife into his arms--together they lay back on the
bed, her body spooned against his. "There'll be other nights--for right now I'm
just happy to be like this--with you."



"Mmm...this is nice," Amanda murmured, her eyes slowly closing. Lee planted a
soft kiss on her lips."



"I love you, Mrs. Stetson."



"Love you too."