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Story Notes:
Disclaimer: The characters from Scarecrow and Mrs. King are property
of Warner Brothers and Shoot the Moon Productions. I have borrowed
the characters without the consent or knowledge of Warner Brothers
or Shoot the moon. This story, however, is copyrighted to the
mentioned author. This story is for entertainment purposes ONLY.
Archive: On The Wicky Archive, anywhere else if you want, please let
me know
.Timeframe: Third season, after "Over the Limit" but definitely AU.
Author's note: This story was born because an Angel had faith in me
that I could do it. For the privilege to see it in here I want to be
grateful toward to wonderful ladies: Cheryl for encouragement and
Jan for the hard work to find and erase all my mistakes THANK YOU
Ladies!


Amanda woke up after a restless night, a glance at the clock told
her it was six a.m. and she had two hours before she had to be at
work and face Lee.
`Why did I do that?' she asked herself.
`Why, did I confess my feelings for him? I shouldn't have done it!
the look on his face after she had opened up to him. Oh My Gosh what
am I going to do?
Remembering the moment she had told Lee, she felt the hot sting of
tears as they rolled down her cheeks.
They'd been sitting on her couch sharing a glass of wine discussing
their last case. It had been a difficult one and Lee had almost
been hurt. She'd been afraid she was going to lose him and her
emotions had been in turmoil. Suddenly she came to a decision and if
she hadn't have acted on it she doubted she'd ever have the courage
again, .She'd placed her glass on the coffee table and turned to her
partner.
"Lee there's something that I want you to know; if I
don't tell you now I'll burst."
"What?"
"I . . . I love you, Lee. I've loved you for so long and I can't
hide it anymore!"
"I . . ." He stopped speaking and Amanda tried to tell from his
facial expressions what he was thinking.
"Lee, say something, please."
"Amanda, we need talk, but later, not now!" Lee rose from the couch
and quickly left through the back door.
Silence, cold and hard enveloped Amanda. She placed her head in her
hands and she felt the sting of tears as they wet her fingers. Had
she lost her partner and best friend?
Amanda was brought back to the present by the sound of pots and pans
in the kitchen. Her first thoughts were of the previous night. She
got out of bed, continuing to think of what had happened.
Why did I confess?
Numbly she padded into the bathroom, and stepped into the shower.
With the steaming water pounding down onto her body she continued to
reflect on her confession to Lee.
I know I wanted him to know. I couldn't hide it any more! He is in
my heart, in my soul When I sleep I see him, and when I awake the
first thing I think of is his dear face.. I hear his voice even when
he isn't in the room. He is with me everywhere. At work, at home
and in my bedroom at night. I fall asleep thinking of him and wake
to find I've dreamed about him.
Amanda got out of the shower and dressed in a blue skirt and a white
blouse, put her make-up on and used a diamond clip to hold up her
hair. Even if Lee doesn't want to see me yet, I need to get to
work. Plus there's only one way to find out if he wants to talk.
She grabbed her purse and headed out the door.
Amanda was directed to Billy's office when she reported in. She was
about to grab a cup to fill with coffee when she heard two girls
from the steno pool talking about Lee at the water cooler.
"Did you hear that Scarecrow volunteered for an overseas assignment?
He'll be gone for at least a couple of months, contact zero."

Amanda just stood there taking their words in. How in the world did
they know? Lee had asked to be reassigned? She hated the rumor
mill. But what if this particular rumor were true?
Then reality struck her, if it were true she wouldn't see him
again. Her legs felt like Jell-O, she leaned against the wall and
slid down to the floor.

*************

Amanda woke up on Billy's couch with her body trembling and tears on
her face. Billy leaned over her, worry etched on his face. She
couldn't hold back and whisperingly she told him everything. About
her feelings. About her confession to Lee and that he had left her
house without saying a word. Billy's eyes conveyed his sympathy as
he told her that he was sorry he couldn't tell her anything about
Lee's assignment. Then it struck her again. Lee was gone, far from
her, he'd put time, and water between them.
Amanda didn't know for sure why Lee had gone without speaking with
her, without an explanation about how he felt, but she had her
suspicions. She looked at Billy and made a decision.
"Sir, I want to begin my formal training, go to Station One, take
all the interrogation courses and Thornton's Repression.
"Amanda, Harry's course is hard, I can't approve it."
"But I want to be a full agent, and for that I must pass all the
classes."
"I agree to all the courses except for Harry's."
"I wish you'd change your mind, Sir." With that said
she rose from the couch and stormed out of Billy's office, slamming
the door as she departed. She'd go see Dr. Smyth.

********************


A month later Amanda was exhausted from her training, but by sheer
force of will she kept going. She was missing Lee badly and needed
to feel his presence, to smell his aftershave, to touch his clothes.
She had always the key to his apartment, and she decided to spend a
day or a weekend there from time to time, just so that she could be
near his things.
So when the boys were with Joe, she was there dreaming, remembering
dinners, case discussions, friendly banters that had made their
relationship so special to her..

Six months passed. Amanda was a changed woman, warm with her co-
workers, almost like the first time she arrived, calm and
professional in assignments, but hard and merciless in the
interrogation room.
Lee's name was never mentioned between them, but when it appeared
in daily reports Billy could see a shiver pass over her entire being
and one tear, only one, roll down her cheek.
Two months later, Amanda was once again spending time in Lee's
apartment. Billy was in his office signing papers, he knew that Lee
was due back today but didn't want to tell her, afraid of her
reaction.
Two hours later, coming back from Dr. Smyth's office, Billy found
Lee sitting on his couch.
"Billy, tell me where the hell is my Amanda?"
"You're Amanda? Not in this lifetime buster! That beautiful, lovely,
caring woman put her soul on a silver platter for you. And what did
you do? You crushed it into the ground!" shout Billy.
"No!" Lee shouted back.
"If you must know, the morning you left on assignment, Amanda looked
for you. We were a heartbeat away from losing her, when she heard
that you volunteered for an overseas job. I was worried Lee, she
became a changed woman in a blink of an eye. She asked for formal
training and Dr. Smyth let her do Harry's course."
Lee began pacing the office, than stopped and faced Billy.
"I wasn't thinking straight. Amanda told she loved me. It scared
me to death and I ran. Hours later I understood. I grabbed my car
keys to go back to her house. I never made it, under the windshield
I found a Zulu Blue note and in a couple of hours I was on my way to
Germany. All I could think of 24 hours a day was Amanda, of coming
back to her. You know me, how impetuous I can be, but the hope of
seeing her again made me wise and careful."
Lee took a deep breath.
"Now tell me where is Amanda? I drove by her house and it's is
empty."
Billy looked straight in his young friend's eyes. He could see all
the love Lee had for Amanda.
"Go home and wait for my call." Watching his friend leave the
bullpen, Billy smiled and said to himself, "yes, all will be fine,
just fine."
Lee arrived in front of his building, shut the engine off, and
rested for a while in the car.
"The Zulu Blue assignment messed up my life. If only I hadn't gone,
but I couldn't say no. Not and still have a job. I should've never
left her to begin with. Why did I leave her after her confession? I
know because I was terrified, I swear; not "if" but "when " I find
her I'll do anything to gain her forgiveness, her trust and her
love".
Lee got out from the Corvette and in no time he was at his front
door. He felt a tingling sensation in his body, but ignored it until
he opened the door. He'd been gone for almost nine months but the
air was fresh and scented. The scent, wildflowers and honey was
Amanda`s body cream
Maybe she was . . .No he didn't want to built up his hopes only to
have them dashed. He went into his bedroom and stopped in the
doorway. Amanda was curled up on his bed sleeping, wearing one of
his shirts. "My Amanda," whispered Lee. The light from the bathroom
lit her angelical face. Tears wet her cheeks. She'd been crying in
her sleep and Lee's heart broke into pieces.
"What did I do?"
He spotted a notebook under her hand and he had an urgent need to
read it. Something told him it was important. Silently he slid it
from her hand sat down to read.
"Oh, Lee please come home! I don't know how long I can
handle being without you. When I woke up on Billy's couch after I
heard about your assignment, my first thought was to quit my job.
But not knowing anything about you, seeing your name on reports or
hearing your name in sweet whispers in the water cooler room, or
imagining you walking through the bullpen doors. It was too much for
me. So I made the brave decision and asked for training. I wanted to
prove myself and to the others that I can make it alone, without the
Scarecrow. I wanted to take Harry's course to exhaust myself. To be
so tired that thoughts about you would disappear. The house was full
of happy memories of you. How every morning you waited for me, how
you'd pop up in front of my kitchen window and at night I'd see your
smiling face in my dreams. You were there but you weren't. I didn't
have anything of you. Nothing to hold on to, only the memories.
This is the reason I'm here at your apartment. Here I can feel
you. I was tired, but cooking in your kitchen, watching a movie
from your couch, wearing your T- shirts and sleeping in your bed,
helped to make it easier. I hope one day you can forgive me for
invading your space. I love you so much, Lee. But my hope to be
loved by you is like shattered glass. You're gone, by your own wish
and the thought is killing me.
When Lee closed Amanda's notebook there were tears in
his eyes.
"Why was I so blind and stubborn for so long! If Amanda will love me
forever I'll do anything to erase all the pain I've caused her. I'll
make her happy, like she deserves!"
Lee took a quick shower and slid in the bed beside her. "I need rest
too." He felt her stir and a second later she cried out. "Lee,
watch out!" Before he could make a move she laid back on the pillow
and as if knowing she wasn't alone snuggled close to him with her
left hand around his neck. Lee felt his body stiffen for a moment,
he didn't want to scare her, and then gently taking her slender
frame in his arms fell peacefully asleep.
A shiver woke Lee a few hours later, for a moment he forgot where he
was, but Amanda's body in his arms gave him a clear message. Home
I'm home! She continued to sleep and he relaxed, just happy to be
lying next to her.
Her eyelashes fluttered as she slowly awakened.
"Good morning, sleeping beauty! How are you?"
Amanda opened her eyes and locked on Lee's gaze.
"Why isn't she surprised to find me here, with her in my arms,
together in bed?" Lee asks himself in wonderment..
She whispered, "I was dreaming, that you came back home, back to me."
"I'm back; I'm `home' and will be forever. Lee leaned his head and
kissed her gently on the lips. "I love you, Amanda."
"I love you too, Lee," she whispered as a tear rolled
down her cheek, wiped away by his hot lips.
Lee claimed her lips again, sweet at first, but with almost nine
months without seeing her, of pent-up emotions, the kiss started a
raging fire that engulfed their bodies.
Later, much later, the need for food, made them leave the bed.
"You know my shirt looks better on you than me but I think there may
be enough room for both of us!"
Amanda smiled and caressed his cheek looking deeply into the hazel
eyes she had missed so much. "Welcome home, Lee!" Her fingers
reached for the shirt buttons to let him find his place.

The end.

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